The 11Kicks House Team finished bottom of its Gold Level mini-league for game week 28. I’ve had my best PR people working round the clock trying to put a positive spin on this. None of them had an answer. Bottom of the league is bottom of the league.

I had a clean sheet from Leighton Baines, assists from Nani and Carlos Tevez, plus a goal, an assist and an incredible red card dodge from Wayne Rooney. But that was about it.

Possibly my biggest mistake was picking Vincent Kompany, who it turns out wasn’t fit because of an injury sustained against Aris last Thursday. (An injury which did not appear in any of my Google News searches on Friday afternoon, by the way). So that’s zero points right there. I also made Raul Meireles captain, which in hindsight was insanely optimistic. Should have trusted my instincts and stuck with Nani.

But bottom of the league it is. 33 points, no prize money. Congratulations to the manager of Come on Boro, who did pick Nani as captain, and so finished in first place with 59 points, thereby securing $40 prize money.

Game week 28 is a weird one. Because of the Carling Cup final, both Arsenal and Birmingham City will be busy competing for silverware at Wembley, which means that both the Tottenham vs Arsenal and Chelsea vs Birmingham will be played at a later today. Basically, if you pick any Spurs, Arsenal, Chelsea or Brum players for game week 28, you’ll get zero points.

So I haven’t. The 11 players I’ve picked to compete in a Gold Level competition ($9.99 to enter, $50 for the winner, $25 for second place, $10 for third place) are above.

I’m hoping Robert Huth scores again for Stoke, backing Raul Meireles to be Liverpool’s main man against West Ham (and so have made him captain) and am crossing my fingers that Alex Ferguson doesn’t rest Nani.

Up front it’s the trident of Wayne Rooney, Carlos Tevez and – everyone’s favourite – Dirk Kuyt.

Think you can pick a better team for game week 28? Get to it then.

If you’re having trouble picking your fantasy football team, then I’ve got some good news for you. 11Kicks keeps a table of the best performing players in the Stats Center.

Below you’ll find the current top 10 (actually 12, because there’s a three-way-tie for 10th place) 11Kicks players by average fantasy football points total.

1. Nani Manchester United 6.0
2. R. van der Vaart Tottenham Hotspur 4.8
=3. C. Tévez Manchester City 4.7
=3. A. Carroll Liverpool 4.7
5. D. Berbatov Manchester United 4.5
6. W. Rooney Manchester United 4.4
7. R. van Persie Arsenal 4.3
8. J. Terry Chelsea 4.2
=9. F. Malouda Chelsea 4.1
=9. C. Fabregas Arsenal 4.1
=9. T. Cahill Everton 4.1
=9. J.S. Park Manchester United 4.1

Chelsea have too many strikers. That’s not a secret. Carlo Ancelotti can’t squeeze Didier Drogba, Fernando Torres and Nicolas Anelka into the same starting eleven, especially not if he wants at least one of the three playing at their peak.

Obviously this is a problem for fantasy football players, because fantasy football is easiest when you know a) Who’s going to play, and b) Who’s going to play well.

I can’t give you answers to those questions, but I can show you how each of Chelsea’s trio of strikers has performed so far this season. This graph compares the fantasy football scores of Didier Drogba (green), Fernando Torres (blue) and Nicolas Anelka (red):

I think the main thing to take from the above graph is that none of the three has been consistent. Lots of peaks and troughs, and rarely at the same time.

Here’s each player’s individual stats:

Didier Drogba: 25 games, 10 goals, 9 assists, average 3.9 points per game.
Fernando Torres: 23 games, 8 goals, 5 assists, average 3.3 points per game.
Nicolas Anelka: 23 games, 6 goals, 4 assist, 3.3 points per game.

You might look at that and decide that Anelka is clearly the inferior of the three. But it’s worth noting that Anelka has spent a good chunk of the season stuck out on the right wing. Not that helps his fantasy football points.

So based on the above, which Chelsea striker should you go for? I say it’s too close to call, so avoid all three until Ancelotti’s plans become clear.

Is Blackpool’s Charlie Adam in your fantasy football team? Because he possibly should be.

The Scottish midfielder has 6 goals, 5 assists and an average of 3.3 points per game so far. Which is only so-so. Nani is almost literally twice as good. But it’s Adam’s recent form that should catch your attention.

He scored from the spot versus Spurs today in a game that wasn’t part of an 11Kicks game week. He also had an assist in game week 27 and goals in game weeks 26 and 25. So that’s four matches where he’s scored respectable fantasy football points. I’m pretty sure that’s called form.

So take a look at your midfielders and think about whether you’ve got room for Charlie Adam. I suspect plenty of Premier League clubs will be doing the same this summer.

UPDATE: As pointed out in the comments, Charlie Adam is suspended for Blackpool’s next two games after picking up hos 10th yellow card of the season in the game against Spurs. So if the above has persuaded you to give Adam a go then hold off until his suspension has been served.

Deportivo La Coruna keeper Daniel Aranzubia made history in Spain this weekend, becoming the first goalie to score from open play in La Liga. Ever. It was the 95th minute and Depor were losing 1-0 to relegation rivals Almeria, so Aranzubia went up for the corner and headed home an equalizer.

In the 11Kicks points system, goals from strikers are worth three points, goals from midfielders are worth four points, goals from defenders are worth five points, and goals from goalkeepers a whopping six points. So all we have to do now is hope a team like Stoke signs Aranzubia, then we sit back and watch the headers and points roll in.

There is no 11Kicks game week this weekend, because it’s all FA Cup and very little Premier League. So it’s a good time to step back and take a look at the Premier League table.

Not the actual Premier League table, but the Premier League table based on average fantasy football points scored per week. Below you’ll find all 20 teams ranked according to their average total fantasy football score (that’s the score of every player on that team added together) over the past 27 game weeks.

1 Chelsea 42.3
2 Manchester United 40.8
3 Manchester City 40.8
4 Arsenal 39.8
5 Sunderland 35.4
6 Fulham 35.3
7 Liverpool 34.2
8 Tottenham Hotspur 33.1
9 Newcastle United 32.4
10 Bolton Wanderers 31.4
11 Stoke City 31.2
12 Birmingham City 31.0
13 Blackburn Rovers 30.3
14 Everton 30.1
15 Wigan Athletic 27.3
16 Blackpool 27.1
17 Aston Villa 27.1
18 Wolverhampton Wanderers 26.3
19 West Ham United 25.9
20 West Bromwich Albion 24.9

You’ll notice that the league stays pretty close to reality, with the major exception that Chelsea are on top. We can probably account for this with results like last Monday’s 0-0 draw with Fulham, which was bad news for Chelsea’s points total, but excellent for their fantasy football total since every defender picked up points for the clean sheet. If things continue to go wrong at Stamford Bridge, maybe Chelsea fans can just start looking at the 11Kicks table instead of the real thing?

Andrei Arshavin is having a better season than you think. I’m not just saying that because of his game winning goal against Barcelona last night. I’m saying that because of his fantasy football stats.

Arshavin has 5 goals so far this season. You might say that’s a poor return for a striker, which is what Arshavin is listed as in 11Kicks. But he also has 11 assists, which is the second most assists of any player. Only Nani can beat that.

On the strength of those assists Arshavin is averaging 3.7 points per game over 25 games so far, making the Russian a more productive pick that Frank Lampard, Gareth Bale of Fernando Torres. That tally would be even higher were Arshavin listed a midfielder, because each goal would be worth an extra point, and he’d also be receiving an extra point for every Arsenal clean sheet.

I think the perception that Arshavin has struggled this season is based on the fact that few of the assists he’s provided have been particularly spectacular or memorable. But if it’s spectacular and memorable you’re after, then look no further than last night at the Emirates…

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Peter Crouch and Aaron Lennon hit the headlines yesterday as Spurs beat Milan 1-0 in the San Siro. It was Crouch who side-footed home, but Lennon who scorched Milan defender Mario Ypes before squaring to Crouch.

Clearly both men can play a bit, but in light of last night’s heroics its worth taking a look at their fantasy football performance so far this season. Before reading the stats below, could you take a guess at which player has the most goals and which player has the most assists?

Smart money was on the striker to have the most goals and the winger to have the most assist, right? Smart money was wrong:

Peter Crouch – averaging 2.8 points per game over 25 games, 2 goals, 8 assists
Aaron Lennon – averaging 3 points per game over 23 games, 3 goals, 3 assists

Believe it or not, this makes sense. I wouldn’t say Crouch is goal-shy, but he’s always been at least as capable of setting up a pal with a nod down from up high. And Lennon still wouldn’t be your first choice of wingers if you could choose who to receive a cross from. He’s just as likely to have a go at goal himself.

In fantasy football terms both are decent, but too inconsistent to recommend as picks. There are other players in both positions that are more likely to score you some points, be it Didier Drogba ahead of Crouch, or Nani as a much more productive alternative to Lennon. If only Spurs could play all their games against teams from Milan, then maybe it would be a different story.

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The 11Kicks House Team finished game week 27 in 6th place in the Gold level mini-league. Not good. Actually it was joint 6th in a three way tie, which means we could also call it joint 7th or joint 8th. Being sixth, seventh or eighth doesn’t change my prize winnings (zero dollars and zero cents), but definitely has an impact on team morale. So where did it all go wrong?

In a way, it didn’t. I picked Robin van Persie and he scored twice, finishing with eight points. I made Raul Meireles captain and he scored for Liverpool, so there’s another 10 points. I put Darren Bent in my team and he even got an assist. My goalkeeper Petr Cech not only kept a clean sheet for Chelsea, he even saved a penalty too! That’s eight points from the man in the padded helmet. So how did I only finish joint sixth (eighth)?

One answer is that everyone else played a little bit smarter and a little bit better. I patted myself on the back for picking Robin van Persie, but every team that finished in the top four took the extra step and made RvP captain, which made him worth 16 points instead of eight.

The other answer is that I gambled on the Manchester Derby being a 0-0 draw, and was wrong. Vincent Kompany, despite having an excellent game, scored zero points. And–stupidly–I dropped Nani.

Ibracadibra did not make the same mistake, and so Ibra’s Best XI scored nine points thanks to Nani’s goal and assist and finished first in the mini-league with 59 points, winning $50. Congratulations to Ibra’s Best XI, and also to liverpoolfc for finishing second (this really is fantasy football) and winning $20 and to Green Street Elite for finishing third and winning $10.

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